🐧I wanna 🖕🏻/ fuck / have sex / be inside you again.

🐧Timeline 10/24 first ride 11/1 you apologized for not seeing me thst week 11/18 I watched Yellowstone 12/2 basically txting 5 days a week 12/10 you said you were looking forward to seeing me 1/3 I asked you out 1/4 I laid on donkey 1/14 you lied to me 2/1 Brad's bday

🧁Sorry… okay I’ll share. Something that excites you this next year? One wish if you had one. Polyamory Ummm talk about us? Talk about if we ran away together. lol

🧁So I promised something very similar just like me spelling your name wrong… But the only reason I said it was because you didn’t respond “fast” so I was worried. I thought what you just mentioned was that instance.

🐧Awe Brad 🫶🏻 you're sweet 💗 I am very happy 😍 with you, in my life.

🧁Sorry I never pinned these.

🐧I have been working on that!

🐧This. Here. Not sure what I was going to say. Just thinking. Brad... I like you. I want to experience my dream for real. Last night I spent way too long thinking about how somehow we could be in bed together.

🐧Ok so we haven't had black holes in awhile. (Besides yesterday I know but that's different) so black hole 1. I want your answers to the above scenarios 2. I do need to tell you my thought about the kids 3. I don't know if I can talk at all via phone tomorrow or Tuesday 😔 4. I'm probably falling asleep in the next 15 min or so 😔 Gosh that seems to be all bad news. Back to something fun for 15 min. Black hole all that. See sometimes this is why I don't want to tell you stuff. I think I usually do but sometimes the stuff like this is sucky and I don't want to say it in the little time we get to talk.

🧁Fuck I have to be in Linden at 1pm tomorrow. [utility company] at 10am (I did switch it again) at the mall by 10:45 Then leave the mall at 12:35. Those are input as predicted times for tomorrow. Just btw. Which is not nothing!

🧁Pickleball Monday night league Morning walks RL Evening office (time change will help me staying out longer) Join same gym Board Game Have me build anything for you for your office/Millbrook.

🐧

🧁[link]

🧁Okay so sex… Fun memories Future memories The random questions you might want to ask /discuss…. About the stuff above? Those are some talking points!

🧁Hey we cannot forget to get a picture of us tomorrow!

🐧Oh no I mean historically. You told me yesterday you hadn't told me

🧁I hear yeah! Oh like you changed stuff for the sake of Derek and maps and location. Or like he changed stuff? Ahh it’s gotta be the first one. Yeah Hillary only has “find my” for my location. I don’t think she’s aware of [search engine] location tbh. She might be aware of some apps like life 360. Just from… well it’s a popular app!

🧁

🧁Something to help me and then other things that popped up. We don’t have to talk about anything other than what you mentioned last night. I just put some one there.

🧁Picture! Picture! Gotta remember:)

🧁Hey I do like you… Also… hear me out, might sound odd how I phrase this but we shall see. When I go anywhere. Like tonight for instance. A lot of people were there. But anywhere… literally. I swear I haven’t found/seen anyone as gorgeous as you.

🐧Hmm this sounds really sweet. What am I missing? lol

🐧Id let you!!! If I were alone!

🐧Ok I know you write me super sweet peaceful message and my brain. Still going crazy. Any chance of you see Christmas food bowl you can give her a little food? I got worried about her last night and was afraid you'd go over early tomorrow or something. Hey I'm sorry again I didn't tell you clearly or txt you at some point yesterday about details. I really like you Brad! I want more time. For all of it 👩🏻‍❤️‍👨🏼

🧁I’ll do my best with my schedule and literally telling you what I’m doing so you are aware. I’m literally just gonna break it up into tasks that I wanna have completed by the end of the week mixed in with a little bit of routine obviously. It is quite literally all flexible. If it’s not, I will have it as an event. You mentioned Wednesday the 1st and the 8th for a time to see eachother for an extended time. Any update on that? Just let me know anything, please. Outside of that I very much want to see you. Before you left, we talked about how we literally want to do a check-ins so no one loses sleep. I don’t want to forget about that. We have one paused conversation that we wanted to touch base with. Defining “wants”and what are actual/realistic possibility’s. That’s all that I can really think of right now.

🧁Me too!

🐧I'm wondering if maybe there are specifically good times for us to txt too. Not about too serious of topics that should be for talking. But just if there are moments where we both have an hour freeish that we can txt freely and maybe even voice. I think sometimes we start that and it's not a good time so it gets frustrating. Just saying maybe that's an option sometimes. It did get us somewhere the other day.

🐧Ok so all this either means you never wanted to tell me you were upset, bothered, annoyed etc with k. Or never were. Or had a boundary that changed.

🧁To think you mentioning my boundary like it was yours was confusing also. was it or was it not?

🧁

🐧But I have shared little annoyances. And you haven't. So there's one of those big gaps about what we share with each other. And it's just not acknowledged or clear why

🧁I personally took all of our conversation as a calm and good tone. Not saying by any means we figured everything out but I do hope a good “ending/pause” to the talk, all things considering. Was that the case for you? As the night went I obviously questioned it more and needed to ask.

🧁I know I need to share more. I do get the gravity of this situation.

🧁Can you show me this conclusion/message you wrote last night?

🧁

🧁Feels important but not serious. I’m just putting this on here because I want to pin this what I wrote not to talk about it like serious but just to remember it.

🧁

🧁Penny! Yes I do promise you…

🧁I’m so very lucky To have you in my life. Don’t ever leave. I won’t.

🐧Brad... yeah. Let's stay like this forever

🧁Shower done! I can make that happen!

🐧

🐧Oh I can get my night away in February! Maybe that would be a zero risk?!?

🐧Youre going to make me do it...

🐧Options A. With me Friday 12-??? Overnight Thursday or Friday. But I'm busy Saturday. Option B. With me Sunday anytime until 4. I'd need to leave by then. But am free Saturday after 5.

🧁Recap so you don’t have to think too much. How devastating if we didn’t meet before Wednesday. I had a couple remarks about how much I liked you and it wasn’t returned😊😏 Spoofing location Wednesday and location you feel god about. I said I could do Magnolia. Slim chance that Derek skips church tomorrow Weekly meet ups! And we both are sad it seems. But also happy.

🐧I'm sorry I wasn't fully there last night. I wasn't planning on that. I hope it didn't mess things up. I want to be with you!! I miss you so much!

🧁Does masturbating each other at the same time feel better coming home then fucking? 🤷🏼‍♂️

🐧I don't know Brad. I've been thinking about it a bit lately. I'm not sure...

🐧Something about all this makes me sad but I'm not quite sure what's behind it

🐧I want to do everything

🐧I wasn't lying. They were good. Things were better. But I did still wonder about your boundaries. I did still feel like you didn't want to share certain things or talk about topics. And I hated you feeling like you couldn't ask me questions and stuff. I hate to even say this but I did feel like you would ask me things that I wasn't sure you would answer. Or maybe just encourage me to talk about things you wouldn't talk about

🐧Oh oh let's add to our list. Not the fuck it bucket one the other one. Do something new and/or weird together. Sexual or otherwise every month

🐧Anything specific that made it that way? That needs a repeat? 😊

🐧Oh so I had three things. 1. Bedtime at 9:15. 2. Use only chess to txt 2 nights a week. Or at least mostly chess past 7:30. 3. No sex. 4. Less seeing each other. Partly because no sex is hard the more I see you and also it just eliminates suspicion as well. But I could possibly do similar things as I have been but just talk to you instead of see you. You tell me any questions you have. We still discuss the sharing thing. I would like to do a semi normal thing with you like riding that maybe Derek knows about. Somehow in my head that helps remove suspicion And... there was one more thing I thought we'd want to talk about but I can't remember now. I can come back and edit this later with it 😊 The one more thing was. Chess code for suspensions or specific suspensions about each other

🐧I started to worry if I had let you down

🧁Move sad pins to [search engine] sheet

🧁Does Brad Hate Derek? Let’s talk about this lol Is it better to be Derek's friend?

🧁then I would say hey is there a time that we can talk tomorrow? Then I would ask hey when can we see each other next? Then the conversation about Derek and you thinking I don’t like him and it seems weird but you’re OK with it. That’s an interesting conversation. Then I’d ask about the 27th then I would ask about how girls trip is going and if there’s any possibility that you can get away briefly there, you mention that months and months and months ago didn’t seem very likely at all, but you mentioned it Then, yeah, that’s all I can do about right now

🧁

🧁

🐧Well I want you inside me

🐧But I don't know if you'd have shared a story of equal importance or not

🐧Yes I have wondered about this. But then we run into things like me being sad about the thing with Eli this week. And it feels somewhat relevant to tell you my feelings. But at the same time. I don't know if you would tell me if something else in your life made you sad

🧁Well one thing we could get better at are those pesky words. Soon Tonight Shortly Haha rough to tell what those mean tbh. Another day!

🐧Sharing about kids. Boundaries. Moving. And more questions. Review our pins.

🐧I am going to remember where we were though. A cycle of me feeling like you aren't sharing but not actually saying that to you.

🧁Especially talking about this!

🧁That’s all I want to do. Take care of you. Make you smile. Happy. I want to hold you. Listen to you. Tell you everything. Feel calm. Feel you! Laugh together. I need to be holding you. Naked. Clothed As long as I am touching you. … Fuck you forever. Anyway, anytime, and however you want. Equally/more important … I want to Make love to you, early and often. Experience every part of you. Explore you. I 🫶you.

🐧Darn! How can I do that...

🧁List is: girls weekend Asheville and how that can work Knowing when Derek is out of town for future seeing you. Any “fooling around” Is there a “fucking” exception. How much I 🫶 you If there was something about moving but that was declared a Talk talk discussion. Ummm

🧁Take donkey for a walk

🐧Everything I need I can't have

🧁Middle of the week stuff

🧁BA morning Once a month to do list and 3x (1) a month fuck it bucket

🧁Yep! Then just when you are out in general. Not specific to tonight. So yes, jealous that someone gets to hang out with you and that person isn’t me

🐧So what do you think I think about you?

🐧I would like to talk about the gummy thing later. No big deal but I'm curious.

🧁Something that seemed important that you couldn’t remember

🧁Well, similarly, it’s is not too far from Wednesday/Thursday.

🧁Nope I lied… just thought of a Mushy thought 🪡🎨 G N I L Y !! 🫠 I’m holding you and it’s the most perfect feeling.

🧁Things I wanna do with you: Putt-Putt Laser tag I wanna go to an arcade place with you Rent a private pool Two full days with you Pickle ball Legitimately wanna work with you someway More donkeys All things new things help me out here :)

🐧Oh let me check in a bit

🧁December 8, 2023

🐧Question about this later

🧁Hmmmmmmmmmmm

🐧Ok maybe something about fucking...I do think I can get away on the 8th. Like 60% chance right now

🐧So May 1,8,11,15,18,21 are all options. 8,11,1,18,15,21 are probably order of likelihood for me

🧁Nope just for now the top 4 I mentioned in the voice. The 8th the 11th the 1st and the 18th. I thought you were responding specifically back to that one

🐧It was a funny thing to me. Something that made me think of you

🧁I know I need to do better job but not just assuming we’re going to talk. (I know that’s part of the other topic probably)

🧁Don’t have to worry about losing eachother

🧁Me too!

🐧I think you say thinks like that when you really think it's me but you're being nice.

🐧You read it. You didn't reply. You never do that

🧁I know and once again, I will try harder. I didn’t know you needed me today.

🐧I do wonder if part of it is I didn't express how hard things were so you didn't realize how bad it was for me. But I have felt like this before. Just not to this degree.

🐧Two things 1. I think I still share too much. 2. I feel weird that I shared how I felt (rushed at the end before activate) but you didn't really get to.

🐧I didn't think you'd want to over txt

🧁Eating with males? Attractive males? 6’3” males?

🧁Let’s fucking do anal Soon!

🐧Yes

🐧Oh and I was going to say something to you about holding hands! Next time we talk 😊

🐧I do think it'd make me happier to talk to you more!

🐧Maybe if we found a way to fuck soon I'd feel better?

🧁It felt different. I know that easy to say… but….

🐧Hahaha oh but when I did she didn't have a pussy. It was like hidden and I didn't know what to do. Apparently that was "normal" and I just didn't do it right 😂 if you do it right that doesn't happen.

🧁Reminding!

🧁

🐧Gosh I feel like I had a sex dream about you last night...

🧁Fuck bus. No nudity. Talking. Video

🧁

🐧

🐧Crap what was it. I know I like you because.... oh we like each other because... it will come to me. Actually maybe something about disagreeing.

🐧We need to fuck in that tent in my car again!

🐧But when I say I have things to tell you it seems like that stressed you out too much and I had to name categories

🐧Thank you Brad. Seriously. But I still want to talk and find the best solution but if you can be patient it would mean a lot to me.

🧁Slash unplugged honestly…

🧁

🧁720 to 750

🐧I think my biggest fear was my parents noticing. They've seen what I've looked like my entire life when I had a crush on someone you know? 😬

🐧

🧁Towel stretch with you future

🐧Pin: you saying I wake you up at 9:30

🧁This is how you started

🐧We say "Do you wanna go bowling? 🎳

🐧But I do remember saying I wanted you to talk openly about Naomi also

🐧Let's discuss options of making sure others don't know at some point

🐧And let me voice this out loud sometime

🧁Let me look. 9/12 and 07/18 the two days we had openings. That you mentioned. July 17th is also your Dance recital.

🐧I have felt like you weren't being fully honest with me. Not on purpose necessarily. Not to be mean or to hurt me. But because you did have boundaries. Or were uncomfortable. Or shy. Or (fill in the blank) so I was being patient or trying to mostly. But yeah it hurts cause I'm pretty much always unsure on us and how we do things, meaning what we share and don't and what our boundaries are and how to protect myself.

🐧And I feel dumb for sharing so much with you when we're not on the same page

🐧I wanna hear you say this!

🧁Yeah, I should’ve put it on the calendar still though. I just didn’t have a time. I mean Monday the 18th of August does work she currently is working that day. And honestly, the 21st could work two potentially cause I’m still working. It just can’t be at my house.

🧁Your friend has shared a link to a [hardware store] product they think you would be interested in seeing. [link]

🧁[From your voice earlier this morning] M - “Also, I really wanted to talk to you this morning...” C- Same! Anything in particular? M- “How are you feeling after our two recent talks?” Brad- (needs to answer) “…Anyway. Yeah, it's your turn. Now. How are you feeling? what have you been thinking about? When do you want to talk? We have to talk about our plan for tomorrow, so I was curious if you want that in there anywhere.” C- (Needs to answer better)

🐧Friday 7/18 2:00 Monday 7/21 5:15 Wednesday 7/23 6:00ish ???? Friday 7/25 9:00 Monday 7/28 9:00 doubtful but maybe 5:15 Tuesday 7/29 3:00

🧁I mean it was wonderful. I tried to describe the slightly less hard penis and that feeling. Like that feels great. So I was probably bouncing back and fourth a little bit? Good feeling that might not specifically make me cum.

🐧Well let's go to sleep on snow

🧁I agree let’s do it.

🐧I want to be with you.

🧁So when you told me on the phone that you could/maybe go down Monday and described the idea, you had thought about it previously?

🧁

🐧I tell you plenty. Gotta have some mystery

🐧lol yeah

🧁But we can talk about something fun that has happened (nostalgic) You can ask me questions. We can touch on some mushy or fucking.

🧁[link]

🧁First off! Great job on the pins recently.

🧁Ohhh I had a question. Do you have orgasm’s with just vaginal penetration? Or does another stimulation/combination would need to occur?

🧁I don’t say what I bring umm I guess that’s true. It’s not much.

🧁This sentence tells you a lot all by itself. lol So whatever I am at on the vanilla scale right now, drop it down a fuck ton and that’s how my sex would look like.

🐧We can go further into your sex life later 😉

🐧Which is logical. And not bad. But doesn't always have to be relevant to me

🐧Well I'd love to hear how you were frustrated later.

🧁Yeah, you were just 100% acting normal, and yeah I felt it was very normal in the moment. I just don’t see why all of our conversations just can’t be like.

🐧No all girls do that. The list thing. And all guys don't like that girls do it

🧁Future topic : witness distress result eyes (I thought of this last night, did I send it?) I meant to.

🧁“Don’t you worry, I’ve got that taken care of.” What were we even talking about?

🧁You can ask me… I wasn’t annoyed.

🐧You'll just ask instead of this?

🧁Yeah, so awkward yeah you’re talking about selling your donkeys all this stuff out of nowhere

🧁Research… on how to find a tracker***

🐧When do I see you again?!

🐧I have been more distracted a lot?

🐧

🧁I trust you. Don’t lie please

🧁So yeah, you felt different huh? But yes… I did say look at me… I was originally referring to how you said yesterday felt different. I believe you said it yesterday. Yeah yeah you maybe fell for me a little more.

🐧I do wonder what you were talking about at the end about me being different. But it doesn't seem super important.

🐧Also you feel resolved enough regarding both conversations from yesterday?

🐧I don't know how long you have. To talk or txt. Or if now is a good time

🐧"A little bit of a lot of emotions"

🧁"A little bit of a lot of emotions" -Brad

🐧Yes! Haha second part

🧁Ohhh and I still need to cook for you!

🧁I mean we could go like set it in the Congo and make it super serious.

🧁Which reminds me I do need to tell you some more specifics of what I do to make sure things are kept safe and not suspicious.

🐧On the show perfect match. The gay girl said she pulled out another girl's tampon with her teeth while she was going down on her. Did you see that episode?!? 😳

🧁But like you coming back from vacation, like your personality and the way you act seem so similar but just like a little different and not in a bad way! I hope they are all good things and I’m sorry if something different than normal.

🐧Also next time we fuck you're standing in front of me and taking off your clothes. I like to watch you undress.

🐧Nope there hasn't really been a chance. But yeah I did tell you when I found out Monday/friday. I did want to talk more about you thinking I'm not sharing

🐧True! There may be other options

🧁It’s not that uncommon for me to be thinking about you… imagining us together. The moments we have shared… and to get all teary eyed! 🥹 like a 1-2 full drops from both eyes. You make me so happy. And I just cannot help it. This week was higher than normal. In the last last 5 days it has happened 3 times.

🐧Of course! Talk to me anytime!!

🐧But I think I have too many pins so you'll have to remember this and counseling

🐧I think counseling was my question?

🧁

🐧We will!

🐧I could always reasonably pretend I was renting an office to you hourly

🧁And shoot yeah never mind I will ask this… dirt* Soon!

🐧Umm maybe. Just that there's more details to talk about/understand?

🐧I really don't know how to fix this. I don't know where it went wrong or how I can stop this in the future

🐧I just needed something to be fixed. Like what happened. Why does this happen to us? How can I stop it?

🐧I mean more so the feeling I have right when you make me climax 🙄 (they really need this emoji in a more sexual way)

🐧With animal masks. Ok 👍

🧁Maybe an update soon on how the Suspicion is going… Interested… and yeah I don’t know.

🐧

🐧I wore a uniform!

🐧I just don't know what you and I talk about. It feels weird to complain but also feels weird to be like oh he did ....he's so great

🐧Oh you heard?

🐧Hey what'd you decide about your hair? I had to interrupt that convo

🐧I am sorry I didn't think to explain that the end date remains the same. So return is end of June regardless of when he leaves. Or maybe June 2027 but that seems like a no now.

🧁AnyWho, when you gave those options, one of them still was coming in your pussy, right?

🐧Also want that convo from earlier today...

🧁Like next. 50/50?

🐧Never secure on that

🐧I think that's one reason we are great together

🐧Just know I care about you so much. And I want you happy. I will sacrifice for you!!!

🐧I just want you happy! Even if it's not with me for the moment. I want you happy!

🐧I wish I'd asked/realized last night this was just for me. Something in the way you said this am made me wonder whereas I had not wondered that before

🐧Ok good that helps a little too. Even if I messed up you know I care and I'm trying to look out for you and do what makes you happy

🧁Read it differently in the moment

🐧Well I do not want to be pregnant. Not at all.

🐧There has to be somewhere public but private and reasonable for us to be

🐧So when you were touching me at the beginning I was just watching you. I don't remember what you were doing then you looked up at me and saw me watching you. But I'm not sure what you were thinking.

🧁Space .

🧁Penny. Go run an errand today please!! Somehow😊🫠

🐧We were 😊

🐧Let's go camping!

🐧From gentle loving hug, massage, folding clothes. To physical difficult things with your hands. (That Marcus couldn't ever do lol). And ride a donkey. Play pickleball. All the things

🐧I'm sorry 😔

🧁Hmmmm I mean just give it time and safe.

🧁But also, it was pretty abrupt sorry that was rude yeah

🐧Please go for it

🧁Massage* us soon!

🐧Random! But you know who I think looks at me? Is smiley older Asian guy? Can't figure out if he's looking at me or he just stands there and smiles at everyone 🤷🏻‍♀️

🐧I mean what do you even think you did?

🧁Yes, like I said it was purposeful because I was scared, but I was telling you and going to tell you that you’re a good enough person that if I tell you that I’m completely miserable without you that you would end it

🧁In case I did I wanted the definition of “general update” ⬆️

🧁Goal for me: figure out why I don’t mind sharing things like the “kite no” (since it’s literally not a problem) compared to the actual amount of times sharing thoughts of that nature to you. Gotta be a reason. Where’s the disconnect?

🐧I do honestly think there's a little residual sense of self protection that flares up and it's not 100% gone since Friday

🐧No I think it just takes a little time and evidence

🐧I just want to learn how to read you better. To know how you feel. When you mean it or are just looking out for me.

🐧Oh no! Why don't you want to ask that? That's sad! 😔

🧁

🐧We should go donkey riding!!!

🐧I guess I wonder the stuff we tell each other what parts of it are only known to us. Like there's been things. I told you that no one else knew. And there's been things no one else knew so I didn't say

🐧No no just like to understand. Like if someone said something and they got a hint I know. How bad is that?!?! Can I play off everyone knew? Marcus knew?

🐧I guess things that are very well known I'd want someone to publicly tell me so it's technically ok that I know!

🐧This wasn't supposed to be super big deal or important. I just started to wonder how private are certain things. And there's opposite

🐧Well if we didn't ask about it in the past and therefore don't understand or know what happened it's easier to hang onto.

🐧You can reply with whatever you want!!!

🧁Great question I’ll have to think about it? Probably a little bit?

🐧I mean I guess you feel somewhat the same when I talk about foster kids. Mine will be in school or daycare so it feels a bit different to me. But who knows!

🧁I don’t know if you ever looked at this document on the shared email. Didn’t finish it. .

🧁Right! Because you do know what I’m doing. But you don’t know why I’m doing that or how I feel doing those things!

🧁I mean do you need the login again?

🐧Oh wow. Well we're talking! That's weird. So just before you and I.

🧁OK, so you’re just seeing if anything I said lined up with what you put down. Cool!

🐧And this (not trying to start something just a good example) is where I still struggle. I feel like I give random details that I'm not sure you'd share. Probably just cause we're different. Not for any specific reason relating to you withholding anything. But it still makes me hesitant sometimes. I'm sorry! But I just wanted to say it because I noticed how I was feeling about txting all that.

🐧When it happens we celebrate?

🧁I mean maybe thought it for a second lol

🐧Oh ok if we're having to distinguish who ranks a little higher than the other per category?

🧁Aww Walt was watching you walk up and I didn’t want him to think I was waiting for you!

🐧Huh?

🐧I worry even more about being completely naked in the winter and getting caught if I'm being honest

🐧Babe I want to not be worried at all about being caught and just fully enjoy you

🐧We just have to be careful right now

🐧Aww

🐧I'd put my phone down to be discrete and then almost fall asleep 😔 I'm sorry

🧁I would like to talk talk to you soon about us.

🐧Ok let's discuss

🐧The "forever remember this" confuses me a bit

🐧You can be nervous about our next date

🧁Quick little note: I wanna fall asleep with you again soon.

🐧Ok so yes we need to find another time. I'm not supposed to be at my office. Could be. Need to check others schedules.

🐧I checked yesterday and then forgot already 🤦🏻‍♀️

🐧Soon. Alone. Lots of time!!

🧁This is a sorta fun place to start reading!

🧁Awww babe!

🐧9:15 my office area 9:00 apartments by school 7:40 walk walk at the park

🧁Okay what else… we hung out in a room that we have fucked in before.

🐧I know. I know that's why your sad

🐧I should just talk mushy to you sometime when I see you. See how quickly you get hard

🧁Ohh this one’s nice and quick and a twist I guess.

🐧Hey sometime do you think we can both watch the same movie even if we're not together?

🐧More than usual

🐧Maybe sometime

🐧Well I think I thought there was a 70% chance you'd say no and I knew I'd still be bothered but we'd have to wait to talk about it. And I was hopeful there was a chance you'd say yes and I wouldn't be bothered

🧁I know this might sound crazy… But honestly, would making love / fucking again soon actually help this more recent scenario we are in? Like restart our entire body system. Quick fix (drug metaphor) I swear I’m not trying to exploit anything serious like this to get sex from you! It’s possibly logical. I don’t know lol.

🐧Oh I had a super weird dream I meant to tell you but can't remember now.

🧁Oh, so this is more of a question of like… I still tell you, but you are asking if something is more difficult to share? Like on the lower end of me enjoying telling you?!

🐧We need more photos. We also need a real one we can keep. We have one riding one I feel good about. I want one somehow normal. Sunday school. Pickleball. Something that isn't crazy that can be on my phone. 🤷🏻‍♀️ is that too much to ask.

🧁

🐧I did enjoy thinking about you in Sunday school

🐧I still worry asking anything like that

🧁Double meanings

🧁

🐧

🐧I mean honestly I prayed about it all day yesterday. I didn't know I was going to. But I was worried all day for you. I want you and Hillary to be happy. I want you to have a baby. I didn't want to be ruining that for you in any way. By having even a convo about guilt. Or by continuing this when it's hurting other people. Or preventing something you want.

🐧Yeah. If that makes any sense it's exactly right. Like I'm a kid and I heard him and I knew but I could easily say he's not talking to me. Not right now. I don't really have to. Until I couldn't be in denial anymore